Soul Searching

We search our whole lives for a spouse, companion, husband, or wife and the people around us always tell us in our quest to first find ourselves and love will find us. Have you ever been so in sync with someone who you notice that they are just like you? You can complete each other’s sentences, you know what he wants on his plate at Thanksgiving, you know how she’ll react to a statement that was made… You’re so in sync with a friend that it’s almost like that person is you? That’s your soul mate; that person is you, in a sense.

When seeking love we often say we’re looking for our soul mate. Someone who we connect to on a higher level. This person is rare and some people never meet themselves, they just find the closest thing to them and fall in love. But some people, .like myself and a couple of others I know, were fortunate enough to find ourselves in someone else and the love shared is magical. I found myself in male form and he was such a beautiful spirit, not perfect at all but beautiful nonetheless. I knew from the moment I noticed me in him that I had to keep him, but I didn’t. I knew when I noticed me in him that he would get lost and confused and take what seemed to be the easier road. I felt when I noticed him in me that I wouldn’t express my anger directly to him, I’d just say whatever, bottle it up, and move on. But I knew when I noticed more of him in me that I’d have to completely walk away from him in order to continue to move on. I’ve met my soulmate, and the love was like a raging fire burning beautifully inside of an ocean, unexplainable. The connection was so rare, the feelings so strong, that we could not handle it so we called it lust and backed away. The connection was so magnetic that backing away took so much strength, strength that neither of us had. I had to be strong for┬áthe two of us, so I was… I knew if I backed away, he’d do the same; see I know him. He is me.

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Potential Love

Potential… Have you ever fell for someone’s “could be”? It’s really easy to do. You have someone that talks the talk, walks the walk… or at least some of the talk and some of the walk… yeah. Don’t do it again! What if that person never lives up to that potential? Like you’re waiting around for them to see how dope they could be but they’re more complacent than dope. Like dude, your complacency out weighs your dopeness? Potential will have you waiting around forever. Seeing and falling for someone’s potential is worst than someone asking you to wait for them. At least when someone ask you to wait they know they have potential and they’re giving you a head’s up that you’ll be waiting. When you fall for someone’s potential you don’t even realize you’re waiting for something. It’s like getting trapped, tangled, intertwined in a self woven web. You did this to yourself. Admitting it is the hardest step. And you know when you’ve fallen for potential because you find yourself defending that person’s dopeness with conversations like “girl, Sean is so smart. He fixed the tv last week and now he’s thinking about going back to school. He is way too brilliant to not have finished his engineering degree. He just hates homework, ya know.” But wait… “Bruh my baby can do your girls hair. She’s always doing her homegirls hair before the club. I’ve been trying to get her to get a cosmetology degree but she’s straight on that.”

Talents were given to us to use, not waste. Don’t fall for the man you know he could be, especially when he doesn’t know who he could be, fall for who he is and nurture what you see in him. Don’t fall for what you think she might be, nurture it until she sees it. If she never sees it, it’s okay to lover her from a distance. Don’t sit around and wait for anyone to be all they can be, they may never become what you see. You may be vision impaired!

 

My Love

I am in love with a man that I can never have
And he’s in love with me
If ever our paths cross again
He’s following down this path with me
I was sent from above
To give him love…
I should be his joy
He should be my pain
She better watch out
If our paths cross again
My every thought of him brings tears
Because absence makes the heart grow fonder
And deeper I’ve fallen throught the years
But I’m in love with a man that I can never have
And he’s in love with me